life lessons – A Cry for Help

Speak…

Posted on February 16, 2019February 16, 2019 by A Cry For Help

Let your voice be heard

They can’t guess or read your mind to know what you want

Say something

Those who speak up will get further than you if you don’t voice your needs

If you continue to say nothing then you will continue to get nothing

They will leave you out because they did not know you were interested

Sometimes we are not excluded from things, we exclude ourselves through our silence

You will be amazed at how attentive someone will be to your needs when you speak up

So go on, let people hear your voice because it also matters

Purpose

Posted on November 5, 2018November 5, 2018 by A Cry For Help

Purpose

Why am I Here?

Why do I Get up every Morning?

Why do I Dress the way I Dress?

Why do I devote Time and Attention to certain Activities over Others?

Why did I Choose this Field of Study?

Why did I Choose to do this Particular Job?

Why do I want to Succeed?

Why do I Say the things I Say?

Why do I Socialise with this Particular group of People?

Why do I Go to the Places that I Go to?

Why do I Give the Things that I Give?

Why do I Believe in what I Believe in?

Why do I Repeat all of the Above ?

Why Questions, they are important to remembering the Reason behind doing what we do Regularly. They are also good for guiding us into understanding what our Life Purpose is. They are a good indicator of Who we are and Why we are.

Given that this Post is about purpose, my question to you is : What Motivates you daily in your life?

Feel free to leave your Comments below.

Forgiveness

Posted on October 19, 2018October 19, 2018 by A Cry For Help

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You hurt me and humiliated me and you never even said you are sorry

And i’m expected to somehow let it slide and forgive you,

Hell no, you do not deserve my forgiveness, you deserve to feel the way I felt

When you hurt my feelings , I will not give you the satisfaction of Forgiving your actions

I love myself way too much to allow people like you to get away with treating me like shit.

I will never forgive you for what you have done to me, I would rather die than give you that satisfaction!

Hold up….

Now I am straight up Bitter and Nasty, I am still mad over something that happened years ago and refuse to move past it. I am hurting inside from all of the resentment I have created over the years. I am miserable, I do not feel happy and I feel worse when I run into that person. Why has that person stolen my joy?

Because I could not swallow my pride and forgive them, Forgiving them does not mean that you excuse their actions, It is Understanding the harsh realities of life and Knowing that you will get hurt at some point in life. You can be bitter over every hurt or you can try and humanize the person who hurt you by understanding that “hurt people hurt other people”, I think it was Joyce Meyer who said that. People who are wounded tend to wanna do the same to other people. If you hold on to your bitterness long enough you will become like the very people you loathe and you will go around hurting other people as well.

Remember that you have also hurt other people and some of those people have battled with forgiving you too. That being said Why do we need to forgive people?

“We must develop and maintain the capacity to forgive. He who is devoid of the power to forgive is devoid of the power to love. There is some good in the worst of us and some evil in the best of us. When we discover this, we are less prone to hate our enemies”

Martin Luther King, Jr

We need to forgive for our inner peace, bitterness makes you nasty and you carry that nastiness with you everywhere you go, it makes your attitude stink, imagine having a stinking attitude, people will not wanna be around you and you wont wanna be around you. We forgive for ourselves and our wellbeing, by doing that we do not forget what was done to us but we choose to let it go and move on peacefully.

I dunno who you are holding in your heart and who you refuse to forgive but I can imagine that a part of you is carrying heavy pain from that bitterness and pretty soon it will spread all over your spirit and rob you of your joy. Let us take bold steps together and forgive people who have hurt us because we will be better off in the long haul.

Learning to love Yourself

Posted on September 17, 2018October 8, 2018 by A Cry For Help

“Self-hatred refers to an extreme dislike or hatred of oneself, or being angry at or even prejudiced against oneself. The term is also used to designate a dislike or hatred of a group, family, social class, or stereotype to which one belongs and/or has.” Wikipedia

When I read this definition I basically saw myself, I have felt like this for most of my life and have become depressed as a result of it. What I am trying to figure out though is why we become like this, What Causes us to Struggle with Self Acceptance and Self Love?

“The child tends to take on the anger, fear, self-hatred, in fact, the whole complex of emotions the parent is experiencing “ Psychalive.org

Upbringing plays a major role, if you are brought up in an environment were your parents or family has low self esteem you are more likely to pick it up and continue the cycle. Both my parents had poor self esteem and it affected me very negatively so I understand how my issues began.

How does Self hatred negatively affect you? Aside from not liking yourself you become very Hard on yourself, seeking unachievable perfection from everything you do. We also Feel like we have nothing to offer especially in Group situations, we Feel Worthless. We develop Anger issues that stem from suppressed hurt and issues we have with ourselves. Lastly it’s the People pleasing struggle that comes from wanting other people to like us and feel gaps that we have created for ourselves because of our inability to accept ourselves.

Now as someone who has struggled with this, I relate to all of the above and understand that everyone has their own personal struggles that stem from a low self esteem. That being said, How Do We Overcome Self Loathing?

“You Accept Yourself because to Live is to Accept our Realities” – A cry for help

We cant run away from our reality and change our upbringing, it is what it is. We can either make peace with it or live in denial. Forgive yourself and those who have hurt you, it is easier said than done for most but it is a necessary step to moving forward.

“Try to exert small kindnesses toward yourself — acknowledge when you are feeling bad and comfort yourself as you would a good friend” xojane.com

We have to learn to Love Ourselves, this means treating ourselves with respect and compassion. We are Uniquely made to stand out as we are and we are deserving of love and happiness, those very things we loathe about ourselves are what make us special and unique.