The Agony Of Unexpressed Love

 

JJ

I feel like I  love you but

I don’t have the courage to tell you

I prefer to write away my emotions

I have been suffering silently  for some time now

Hoping these feelings will fade away somehow

I was not prepared for the agony I would Endure

God why did I have to like you

Why am I not Confident enough to express myself to you

Unexpressed Love is Brutal

If there is someone out there that you may feel something for

Tell them before it eats away at your core

Don’t join the rest of us who mask our feelings due to fear

Be bold, the worst  they can say is no

It will spare you from unnecessary Grief.

 

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Be Peaceful In The Storm

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Life Happens to all of us

Sometimes we win and sometimes we loose

It’s not about what happens to us but about how we react to what happens

It’s easy to be happy about all the great times in our lives

It’s not so easy to to be calm in the tough times

It is doable

It begins with accepting Reality

What has happened has happened and you cant change that

You can cry until your eyes bleed or 

You can put down the Kleenex and Keep it moving

There is a great feeling of peace from total Surrender

When you give up the resistance and  accept your predicament

Get up and  Move forward

There is not a thing that will happen to you that you wont be able to handle

Don’t run away from the storm

Face it head on 

It is then when you will find your peace.

 

Don’t Be Afraid of Charging what you are Worth

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It’s important  to know how much you have to offer and to have some confidence in your service as a business person.  Us nice people sometimes find ourselves torn between being nice and being business people wanting to make a profit.

People will take advantage of you if you do not learn to separate personal feelings from business. We have to realise that being nice will not put money in the bank but being serious about our business will.

We are all valuable people with a lot to offer and we should always believe in what we offer as well as understand the value of our service to clients that we service, that is what determines our rates and fees for services rendered.

So as you begin another day of the week remember why you do what you do and the value of your service, you work hard and love what you do and it is only fair for you to Charge what you are worth.

 

 

For You

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You are Extremely Distracting
Every time I’m Around You It’s Extremely Enchanting
I think It’s fair to say that I have A crush On You
Because my Mind can’t seem to get Enough of You
Please note that I don’t expect you to Return the Feelings
I just wanted to tell you what I’ve been Concealing
Now that I’ve told you how I feel I can begin to heal from my Ordeal

Remember this Today

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Remember to breathe

Take a minute to soak in what is happening around you

Your feelings/ Mood will match your experiences today

You will get through whatever you are facing right now

Don’t force anything that is blocked from you, instead go with the flow

You are still an amazing unique Person

Everyone around you is struggling with insecurities as well

This day will end and everything happening now will be a memory

Relax you are perfectly fine the way you are

Confessions from a Suicidal Girl

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It’s friday morning and most people are excited for the weekend, she rises dreading the day.

She checks her phone and finds no calls from her mother, maybe she is tired of  hearing her cry over the phone. Maybe she just needs a minute to digest the fact that her only daughter doesn’t seem to appreciate the life she has.

No matter how she looks at it, she feels alone, there is nobody who can understand her internal struggle. She walks around with a facade looking like she is on top of things when her world is falling apart inside.

She takes sticky paper from her fridge and writes  her mother’s phone number, she includes another number for a relative who can be reached just incase her mother misses the call.

Her plan is to hang by  the fire escape, she chooses this location because of its seclusion  in the building.  Maybe she doesn’t wanna be found decomposing in the flat so a fire escape will do.

She  showers and brushes her hair knowing that this will be her last time doing her daily routine. She picks out her favourite dress and puts it on. Her attire is all black suiting the occasion.

She turns on the TV and eats last breakfast, she watches a spiritual TV show hoping some sort of miraculous message will get her to reconsider. Instead she finds herself more detached to spirituality than ever.

She sobs as she eats the cereal, fighting to not completely break down. There has been way too many tears shed and today is just not the day for “self pity”

She leaves her apartment and takes one last stroll around the town that she called home for the past 6 years.  Life goes on as usual, the weather is beautiful, it’s not hot and it’s not cold either.

She puts on her headsets and listens to Coldplay as she crosses the street in the busy morning.  The music is calming to her soul. She  walks through the business  district and remembers all the experiences she had in this neighbourhood.

She finally makes her way back to her building , she grabs the note she made earlier and puts it in her purse. She  cleaned her place the day before knowing she did not wanna leave a mess behind.

She walks out of the flat and locks the door, there is an unusual silence in the air  as she walks down the passage. She opens the door to the fire escape and shuts it.

She takes her scarf and ties it around her neck, she reaches for the railing and ties the scarf against the bars. She begins to feel pressure against her neck, it’s so strong and overwhelming.

Her eyes feel like they are about to explode, its getting real, this is how it feels when your soul struggles to leave your body. Her heart is racing in panic, she is scared of  what is happening to her.   She is scared of where she is headed, she does not know what lies ahead. Her body jerks around, she begins to feel light headed.

There is no coming back from this, at this point her brain will begin to shut down but if someone finds her before that, she is looking at a life of irreversible brain damage and physical disability.

She rises from her bed drenched in sweat, she is relieved  because she was horrified  with everything that was happening. The dream of her suicide makes her realise that she does not really wanna die, she just wants her pain to stop.

What do you do when you just don’t have the will to continue, when you feel like a dead man walking. What do you do when you feel like your life is not worth living.

Talk to someone, and ask for help with the issues you are struggling with.  You may feel like you don’t matter, but you do matter to the people in your life. Talk to them and ask for help because your life is worth living even if you may not always feel like it is.